Six Years Lost and a Lifetime Gained

For reasons that no longer matter, I parted company with my parents for six years, during which time I refused any and all contact with them. My guardian angels and guiding spirits assisted God with creating a Divine opportunity last fall that allowed me to step outside of my egotistical self and initiate contact, and finally put an end to the stalemate I had established.

The what, where, when and why of everything is truly irrelevant and I only mention the six years lost in order to provide a glance at "then" so as to better understand "now". Everyone involved agrees without hesitating that the time apart was much needed for all parties to become more fully self aware and to resolve individual trials and tribulations that were unfolding prior to the split.

I thank God every single day for the time spent apart, as well as the time spent together now, because "now" is truly a lifetime gained. There were so many things I couldn't see, feel, understand, comprehend or accept then. And now...because acceptance comes first and serves as the ruling emotion...seeing, feeling, understanding and comprehending come so naturally, without effort.

It's been almost six months since the six years ended, and the moments we share now are so heartfelt, honest and meaningful. I'm discovering my parents as adults, without familial ties and agendas, and who they are as individuals, as a married couple, and as two people who are the foundation of who I am.

It took this time apart to find what was truly important for all of us. Life had become more of an obligation than a genuine want and need to participate in each other's lives. Simplicity exists now where complexity was rooted then.

Its the little things that are the most important to me now. Watching mom and dad work on their jigsaw puzzles reawakened my love of putting a beautiful puzzle together, and sparked a new "downtime" activity that relaxes and rejuvenates me. Conversing with dad in what at times can be heated political discussions are conversations that enlighten me and cause me to challenge my own knowledge of our government and our political systems, and how it affects our lives. Talking with mom and taking the time to really listen to her talk about her feelings and emotions gives me insight into the depth of her soul as a woman and as a mother and from that, I gain strength and inspiration to continue my journey of discovering who I am as a woman and where I'm headed in my life. Sharing stories of events that have transpired during those six years has helped me realize my mother has cried the same tears as I have during the process of a mother watching her children spread their wings and fly away.

My mom and dad are the very fabric of who I am, and I am so grateful they have opened their arms and welcomed me back into their lives. The "hole" in my heart is finally gone and my life is filled with love.